Anyway, allow me to explain my hypothesis. ... where was I ... oh yeah. So the idea is that I am self-centered. I worry so much about my problems and the way I look to other people. What does a normal person worry about? I am always comparing myself to a standard which I cannot even define, so I make it up and base all of it's attributes on areas where I lack, which end up being ubiquitous, because the areas which I perceive as lacking are lacking by comparison to the standard which is defined by those areas.... Well, now, that isn't completely true (lol, I am refuting another generalization). I know that several of my standards are based on what I have learned about the "Righteous Man" as defined in the Bible. Unfortunately, the Bible doesn't tell me how to make small talk. ... Maybe I should narrow my focus down to just social interactions. The problem with doing that is that studying social interactions for the purpose of being a more adept socialite is a quantificational fallacy. Not only that, but in practice it would inevitably lead me to commit countless other fallacies -- to name a few (and feed my ego -- I'm totally on wikipedia right now), historian's fallacies, fallacies of the single cause, and what might become most prevalent, a perfect solution fallacy.
Now, without discussing the problems with any attempt at perfecting social interaction, lets go back to talking about me (case and point, right?). So, what I gather from the way people act around me is that I'm not doing so poorly in that area anyway. I have good friends, and they seem to be pretty cool with me in general, and I also with them. But I constantly beat myself up anyways. I guess, maybe I'm just insecure, but how do you beat insecurities? Where do you draw the line between confidence and conceit? On that, is it better to draw the line too low or too high (assuming that there is no correct place, or that the correct place is impossible to hit)?
So a few(1) of my friends(friend) are(is) starting blogs(a blog) and they want me to read theirs, and they think that they will read mine in exchange (at least, thats the hint I'm getting...) Not a bad deal, I suppose. It will be an interesting change from my other blog, in which I kept up a similar exchange, but with someone who was much farther away -- and it was our only real mode of communication. We haven't talked much lately. We kept that up for a long time. Maybe I should try and get back in touch.
I just read the first blog in that set. Here is where I run into problems with writing my thoughts online. If I am going to blog here seriously, then maybe I don't want people who I talk to on a regular basis discussing my posts with me in person. Honestly, if any of the people in my dorm comment (as in, with their mouth, to me, in person, not on line) to me about a single post on this blog, I am blocking them and putting this blog on "private" which is something I really don't want to do because it will make it impossible for me to have any audience at all --and, given the length of these posts and the nature of my writing, I don't think my odds of generating an audience are very good at all to begin with.
... ok, I'l follow the blog.... *damaged pride*
Pride is over rated anyway.
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