Today has been really great. God opens a door and then closes another. I was shown something really great, but then I was shown that I couldn't do it. God just keeps showing me things that are possible, but he hasn't yet shown me what I can actually accomplish. (Not that this is really an accomplishment, but it's something I know God has plans for... and it's none of your business).

My English final had that phrase in it, and pointed directly at the reader: "frankly, it's none of your business". I don't think it will hurt my grade too much. It kinda worked in context.

I met someone today who I hadn't met since 6th grade. He offered to hang out tomorrow, I think that if I get the courage and the opportunity, I will ask him about a few people who I knew when I attended BIS. It's weird of me, I know, but they are people who picked on me excessively back then, and changed me as a person, I think. Like, I am convinced that my life and personality have taken some very distinct roads based on the way those people treated me. Sometimes I wonder who I would be if they hadn't. I think I am changed for the better, but I still harbor some negative feelings for them. It isn't like I'm gonna hunt them down or anything, but maybe just ask them what happenned with their lives. Are they moving on to better things? Are they still complete ass-holes? That kind of thing. I don't expect any apologies, and if they apologized it might ruin me for a few minutes. I would have to reconstruct my worldview all over again. I don't think I would cry or anything, though. Maybe just pat them on the shoulder and not be able to carry an intelligent conversation for a while.

Met a Korean girl today. Real quiet girl, but had the accent for sure. Made me miss my Korean friends from LeTU.

I really missed my music today. I was singing parts of mewithoutyou songs all day. "and not one [something] of her gesture could i forget.. the prettiest [something] i ever met." "i was dead then alive, she was like wine turned to water and then turned back to wine, and you can pour us out --we don't mind. as scratched around the mouth of the glass 'my life is no longer mine'" "and i'm gonna take that grain, and i'm gonna crush it all together into a bread as simple and sincere as when the dryness and the rain finally drink from one another a gentle cup of mutual surrender tears."

"I never get a break."
"These walls won't come down."
"I can't wake up."
"You don't belong."

feels like it rhymes, but it doesn't