*blaaaah*

I've been dying to get back to that series I was writing before, but [brace for excuses] I've just been too tired, and work is mentally draining, and even on the weekends I don't feel like thinking hard, and Chowon and I haven't been talking much and she is my best "primary" outlet, which would otherwise allow me to reach a state of emotional relaxedness conducive to self development. Like, before I can cook my meal and eat it, I have to go to the grocery store and stock my kitchen -- before I can put any focus on self-development, I have to get all my baggage out of the way. If a spring is under a lot of stress to begin with, it's not gonna be very springy when you bounce stuff on it; if you destress it first, then it can bounce better.

This blog is kindof like a place where I can get baggage out of the way, but these days it's not the kind of baggage that I need to talk about to get off my chest. It's more like, I have been focusing at 70-95% (oscillatory) all day, and I need to give my CPU a break before it melts.

I'd really like to finish the series, though...

Oh well. I wanna give a shout-out to this post. I think it's right on the money.

http://lindsayleighbentley.com/2014/06/30/i-am-ryland-the-story-of-a-male-identifying-little-girl-who-didnt-transition/

When I was a kid, (not exaggerating at all, ask my mom), I would assert for weeks at a time that the sky was green, the grass was blue, that I was king of the insects, and that I was able to interpret bee language and have regular conversation with ant hills. My parents would double check me to make sure I knew the truth, and then they would just play along with me. As long as I knew the truth, it wasn't a big deal. Nowadays I'm scared poopless of bugs, but that's beside the point.

The point is it doesn't matter what you say about yourself when you're 5 years old. Parents ought to give their kids the honest and consistent truth until they get old enough to grasp the nature of people and the world around them, and then make their own decisions (whether that be for or against reality).

Ok, now for my bigoted, horrible, white Christian male opinion. Nobody listen, please. Everyone disregard me because this opinion is officially worthless to the world as soon as my skin color and physical gender are taken into consideration (*cough cough insovietrussiaracismhatesyou cough*).

In the case of transgender, we really need to come up with new gender terms to differentiate physical gender and emotional gender. If that clarification isn't made, and if we teach kids that by saying they're [opposite gender from reality] they become that, then we're teaching our kids to practice illogical thinking. If you only have male parts, then you are decidedly not a female physically. However, for the sake of argument, suppose you can have male parts and be a female psychologically. In that case, for a five year old, the parents shouldn't tell the male kid, "ok, you're a girl." because a girl has female parts, and a male has male parts, and you're gonna really confuse that kid when he gets older if you don't give the kid a sex change pre-puberty, which is a dangerous procedure and has potential to cause hormonal imbalances that negatively affect your cognitive functions during your entire life. Our English language wasn't necessarily built with normalization of perverts and sexual deviants in mind, so as that sort of thing becomes normalized we should at least develop new terms to avoid confusion.

"we came down from the north;
blue hands and a torch.
we share our mother's health.
it is what we've been dealt."